Let's talk about silvergifting
Jan. 3rd, 2023 08:44 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
elennaloreSnowflake challenge #2 was to write a promo, manifesto or primer for your fave character, ship or fandom. I chose to write something about my fave ship in the Silmarillion fandom, silvergifting. That is: Celebrimbor/Annatar | Sauron | Mairon (he has many names).
It happened that I found the online Silm fandom 2020 while searching for inspirational pictures of Sauron for a Númenor-centric fic I was writing. I found pictures, and realized something that should have been obvious, but somehow still wasn't: Sauron was good-looking!
It didn't take long until I was reading Sauron-centric fics on Ao3. I was interested in other Silm characters as well, especially the Fëanorians. I liked angbang (Mairon/Melkor) at once and read fics and enjoyed seeing fanart about them. Mairon is Sauron's original name and I began to call him mainly by that name. It's said that by which name you talk about Sauron may tell about your preference how you want to see that character arc. I don't see him as black-and-white evil type, but more complex.
When I first read silvergifting, or saw silvergifting art, it evoked an unusually strong reaction in me. It was obvious that this was a pairing with strong emotions - both good and bad kind, and sometimes conflicting. My initial reaction was aversion. I remember that I disliked a silvergifting fic by a fan writer whose angbang fic I had enjoyed. I thought that it was a story about a victim and an abuser, and I felt that the love in that relationship was fake and it was a manipulative ship.
But they didn't leave me alone.
I realized that I had become fascinated by the ship, and not just because of the horror aspect (although I must admit that the best gore fic ever is about this ship). They seemed so devoted to each other! I began to wonder about the nature of this ship, and how much love and companionship there was in addition to the betrayal. I also began to wonder what they would do, given a second chance. Because I'm a fic writer, my ponderings made me write my first silvergifting fic.
When I began to write their reunion story, I really wasn't sure how it was going to end, but during the writing process, I began to feel that they would take this second chance to love each other, and that was because there was love involved in the first place - at least in my headcanons.
I see Celebrimbor as if going on a grail quest in his desire to understand this Maia being, Annatar (aka Mairon). I see Mairon finding a soul mate in Celebrimbor. Their common desire to create (until the making of One Ring destroys it for Mairon) is what unites them. Mairon screws up it, of course, and it's a horrible end. It's very personal at that point, I think. I'm happy that the Elves can be re-embodied because I want to give their story a happier (second) ending. Mairon has a lesson to learn. In my headcanons, Celebrimbor is willing to give him the second chance.
When I gave myself permission to love this controversial pairing I began to see the complexity of it. Love and despair - it's very romantic, and I love dark romantic tales with angst, and hurt/comfort, but also hope. Now many of my fics are written about them. I have organized a silvergifting week on tumblr. I sometimes draw them - the art in this post is mine and pictures them in the early stages of their relationship. Call me converted.
Amor vincit omnia.
It happened that I found the online Silm fandom 2020 while searching for inspirational pictures of Sauron for a Númenor-centric fic I was writing. I found pictures, and realized something that should have been obvious, but somehow still wasn't: Sauron was good-looking!
It didn't take long until I was reading Sauron-centric fics on Ao3. I was interested in other Silm characters as well, especially the Fëanorians. I liked angbang (Mairon/Melkor) at once and read fics and enjoyed seeing fanart about them. Mairon is Sauron's original name and I began to call him mainly by that name. It's said that by which name you talk about Sauron may tell about your preference how you want to see that character arc. I don't see him as black-and-white evil type, but more complex.
When I first read silvergifting, or saw silvergifting art, it evoked an unusually strong reaction in me. It was obvious that this was a pairing with strong emotions - both good and bad kind, and sometimes conflicting. My initial reaction was aversion. I remember that I disliked a silvergifting fic by a fan writer whose angbang fic I had enjoyed. I thought that it was a story about a victim and an abuser, and I felt that the love in that relationship was fake and it was a manipulative ship.
But they didn't leave me alone.
I realized that I had become fascinated by the ship, and not just because of the horror aspect (although I must admit that the best gore fic ever is about this ship). They seemed so devoted to each other! I began to wonder about the nature of this ship, and how much love and companionship there was in addition to the betrayal. I also began to wonder what they would do, given a second chance. Because I'm a fic writer, my ponderings made me write my first silvergifting fic.
When I began to write their reunion story, I really wasn't sure how it was going to end, but during the writing process, I began to feel that they would take this second chance to love each other, and that was because there was love involved in the first place - at least in my headcanons.
I see Celebrimbor as if going on a grail quest in his desire to understand this Maia being, Annatar (aka Mairon). I see Mairon finding a soul mate in Celebrimbor. Their common desire to create (until the making of One Ring destroys it for Mairon) is what unites them. Mairon screws up it, of course, and it's a horrible end. It's very personal at that point, I think. I'm happy that the Elves can be re-embodied because I want to give their story a happier (second) ending. Mairon has a lesson to learn. In my headcanons, Celebrimbor is willing to give him the second chance.
When I gave myself permission to love this controversial pairing I began to see the complexity of it. Love and despair - it's very romantic, and I love dark romantic tales with angst, and hurt/comfort, but also hope. Now many of my fics are written about them. I have organized a silvergifting week on tumblr. I sometimes draw them - the art in this post is mine and pictures them in the early stages of their relationship. Call me converted.
Amor vincit omnia.
no subject
Date: 2023-01-03 08:19 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2023-01-04 10:58 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2023-01-05 12:27 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2023-01-07 12:06 am (UTC)This portrait of them is just such a delight to look at! They look so comfortable together, both secure in the deeply felt knowing that they are loved.
And although I know this is your OTP, it's so lovely to read about your journey with them!
Thank you!
Thoughts
Date: 2023-01-08 11:52 am (UTC)... kinda like a troll who keeps making new accounts so he can keep bothering people. Wait, that would make a funny fanfic.
>>It was obvious that this was a pairing with strong emotions - both good and bad kind, and sometimes conflicting.<<
Well, sometimes people with personal problems and crappy relationship skills wind up together, because that kind of chaos feels familiar and therefore attractive to them. This does not magically grant one of them relationship skills. So then they hurt each other. Very often, they abuse each other, but they've picked different types of abuse, like one physical and the other financial or emotional. Many people insist that abuse can only ever be one direction, but I have seen a LOT of relationships between two fucked-up people whaling on each other. So when I see these "complicated" fanfic ships, that's what I think of. Every once in a while, somebody takes two fucked-up characters, drags them through a bush backwards, and makes them learn how to treat each other better. Those can be very interesting fics.
>>Their common desire to create (until the making of One Ring destroys it for Mairon) is what unites them. <<
Kinda like people who make a baby and then have no fucking idea how to be parents, and it tears them apart, and then there's another victim in the pit.
... I always felt sorry for the Ring when the hobbits were carrying it. Especially Sam, who wanted nothing whatsoever to do with power. Imagine the poor Ring pulling out all the stops, and Sam is like, "Well, do you know how to cure black spot?" and Ring is "WTF is black spot??? Why isn't any of this working?"
Because that's what happens when you try to run software on the wrong operating system. LOL But poor Ring.
>>When I gave myself permission to love this controversial pairing I began to see the complexity of it.<<
Fandom is all about loving what you love, and not having to apologize for that.
Re: Thoughts
Date: 2023-01-08 06:06 pm (UTC)Re: Thoughts
Date: 2023-01-08 09:15 pm (UTC)I'm also interested in characters who are constructs. So here we have a Ring, which was created, and which contains a part of Sauron's soul and a very large portion of his power ... that gets split off from him for a very long time. That tends to create a divergent personality.
Now for part of that time, the Ring manages to latch onto people of types it was prepared to interact with, like humans. Isildur? No problem. But then it fell into hobbit hands, and that didn't go well at all. Once Gollum took it under the mountain, it never did manage to attract a goblin capable of wresting it away from him and carrying it back to the surface where it could then bait a more useful host.
Then Bilbo. Then Frodo. Neither of them were interested in the Ring's usual efforts, forcing it to exert maximum effort for minimum return.
Boromir comes along. "Finally, someone who can understand me! Pick me up, pick me up, pick me up! AAAAA, NO, NOT THE SODDING HOBBIT AGAIN!"
And then Sam, to whom the Ring's offerings turned up to 11 are downright repellent. "I'll just be here banging my head against this rock for a while because SODDING HOBBITS."